Category Archives: Learn
Wishful Wednesdays
I’ve been on cloud nine ever since yesterday afternoon at work. I was sitting at my desk working on numerous spreadsheets and project data analysis, as per usual, when I noticed an email notification pop up in Outlook. I briefly saw the email address of the sender and realized that it was from the admissions director for a Master’s program I had applied to. Let me tell you, there’s nothing like fear and anxiety to completely break your concentration. My heart started beating rapidly and I literally thought it was going to burst out of my chest.
After taking a deep breath, I finally had the nerve to open the email. This was it. The moment I had been waiting for for a solid month and a half. I scanned the email for the word “accepted”, and there it was on the second line. I let out a sigh of relief, sat back and smiled, then reread the email just to be sure. Yep, there it was:
Hello Kristen,
This email is to confirm that you have been accepted into the MID Program. Congratulations!
You are an excellent candidate for the program; the directors were very impressed with how much you have accomplished at such a young age! You should be receiving your welcome packet within a week or so. I am looking forward to working together.
Talk about a Merry Christmas to me, a couple weeks early! In a previous post, I had mentioned that I’d been accepted into The University of St. Thomas and planned to pursue a Master of Business Administration degree (MBA). Surely enough, those plans have changed. I am proud to say that I will be attending Texas A&M University’s Master of Industrial Distribution (MID) program beginning in Fall 2013. Aggie Class of 2015, I’m comin’ for ya! Whoop!
For this Wishful Wednesday, I already got my wish. But as always, my excitement took over and I started making a list of things I wanted with my new school’s logo (nerd status). I may or may not have already bought an Aggie blanket. Yeah, that definitely happened.
Here’s what I’ve come up with:
Texas A&M Aggies Ladies Maroon Team Player Racerback Tank Dress - $25.46
Texas A&M Aggies Women’s Heather Adidas Original Shirt – $20.39
Texas A&M Aggies Black Arch Crewneck Sweatshirt – $27.99
Texas A&M Aggies Charcoal Huddle Up Hooded Sweatshirt – $44.99
Texas A&M Aggies Pillow Pet – $22.74
Five Tips for Standing Out in Your First Job
Adapted from Monster, Alexandra Levit hits some key points. I couldn’t have said it better myself.
Hopefully, this isn’t news to recent college graduates, but the workplace is more competitive than ever. If you have a job already, congratulations — you’ve made it over the first hurdle. Now it’s time to make sure you can stay put through this economic crisis and beyond.
Here are five essential tips gleaned from working with HR staff, managers and twenty-something employees in hundreds of organizations.
1. Be the One Everyone Wants to Work With
Members of Generation Y, or those born roughly between 1978 and 1993, unfortunately, have a reputation of showing up to work with a sense of entitlement. Combat this perception by showing that you’re willing to pay your dues and learn from any assignment, owning your career progression and being a “can-do” person. If you encounter roadblocks, marshal your resources to get around them rather than letting a project languish.
2. Surpass Your Boss’s Expectations
Find out what the boss wants from you first, and then brainstorm ways to go above and beyond the call of duty. You can also establish a good rapport by making your new boss feel needed. Show that you are ready and willing to be guided, and bond over the fact that he has some years on you. Understand the value of self-sufficiency, and approach your boss with a problem or complaint only if you’ve explored all options for resolving it yourself.
3. Carve a Niche for Yourself Through Innovation
Ask yourself what your company or department needs, and think about how you can use your unique set of skills and talents to provide it. So what if you’re hardly a Renaissance man or woman? You’re still new blood. Can you offer a fresh perspective on a vexing problem that has been plaguing your managers for months? Can you find a way to do something faster and more efficiently?
4. Take the Extra Step to Help Someone
Beach-ball management, or bouncing a request over to a colleague because it’s not your responsibility to handle it, is all too common in the professional world. If someone asks you a question and you don’t know the answer, make it your business to find it. By doing whatever you can to ensure your department or organization is perceived in a positive light, you will add value and stand out as a team player.
5. Subtly Promote Your Achievements
If you want people to take notice of you, you must make your accomplishments visible. How do you share your contributions without being perceived as arrogant or boastful? The key is enthusiasm. If you emphasize your passion when describing an achievement, people will think you’re just excited about it. An excited person appears earnest, and it’s hard to be critical of someone who’s earnest.
Of course, these suggestions aren’t limited to new college grads. If you’ve been out of school two years or 20, the tips might well be worthwhile in hanging onto your job through the downturn.
{Alexandra Levit, a nationally recognized business and workplace expert, is the author of the They Don’t Teach Corporate in College: A Twenty-Something’s Guide to the Business World.}
Job Search Blues? Keep Those Spirits Up
If you’re having a difficult time finding a job, and it seems like it’s taking forever, don’t despair. We’ve all been there. The uncertainty of what lies ahead. The fear of never finding a job or plopping into the wrong one. The anxiety and stress from interviews-gone-wrong. Take a breath. Relax. You have something the rest of us don’t – spare time. So smile!
Here are some suggestions for keeping your spirit positive.
Think Up
The mind is a powerful vessel. How we think and what we think can control our spirits. We literally can think ourselves up or down. To keep out the negative thoughts and self-doubt:
- Wake up thinking or saying positive statements.
- Avoid negative media, news, emails, and downer movies and television.
- End the day thinking or saying positive statements.
- Think about the positives a new job brings: new skills, new relationships, and a new chance to show your skills and talents.
Positive Reminders
Surround yourself with quotes or statements of hope and encouragement. Write your favorites on sticky notes on the refrigerator or computer — somewhere you can easily see them. Two favorites from Winston Churchill:
- “The pessimist sees problems in every opportunity…whereas the optimist sees opportunity in every problem.”
- “Never ever, ever, ever, ever, ever give up. Never give up. Never give up. Never give up…”
Take Steps
Literally. Move. Being a couch potato shows. Leave the house at least once a day. Exercise, jogging or walking will:
- Re-energize you.
- Help to clear the mental cobwebs.
- Prepare you to look your best for interviews.
Pamper Yourself with Kind Acts
How you treat yourself can impact your spirit.
- Play your favorite music softly in the background while you “work.”
- Eat healthy without hugging the refrigerator. Now is not the time to bulk up.
- Sing — regardless of quality. Singing happy songs will actually will help to stretch and relax your vocal chords while refreshing your spirit.
- Avoid being sloppy. Dress and groom yourself with respect — for you.
- Treat yourself with affordable goodies such as a favorite food or beverage, an afternoon movie with popcorn, doing something touristy, or a mindless novel.
See Spirited People
Make sure you spend some time, preferably in person, with positive and supportive people every day.
- Surround yourself with yea-sayers and avoid the naysayers.
- Work your network.
- Call people rather than email or texting them — it’s more personal and supportive.
- If you’re single and live alone, go to the library or a coffee shop to be around others.
- Help others in need. Get out of yourself from time to time.
- Spend quality time with your family and friends.
Keep at the Top of Your Game
Keeping your spirit up has a lot to do with how you feel about yourself. Don’t let your skill set and knowledge slide.
- Keep up on industry news.
- Read trade journals and business magazines and newspapers.
- If possible, practice to improve your career skill set.
Now’s the Time
Enjoy the positives of your job search, like having spare time. Remember all those times you said, “If I only had time, I’d…”
- Read those books.
- Clean that closet.
- Take that class.
- Get in better shape.
Do Your Best Work to Find Work
Knowing you’re taking all the right steps to find a job will help improve your spirits.
- Write a perfect resume and cover letter for each job.
- Send X amount of resumes out each workday without fail.
- Keep up-to-date records of results.
- Keep accurate contact information on companies, executives and hiring agents.
- Have your interview clothes clean and ready to wear.
- Work at finding work every day.
Article by Pat Mayfield via Monster
Dangerous Topic: Politics
Like the majority of folks in the U.S., I tuned into the first presidential debate last night. Needless to say, I’m more confused now than I was before. I truly think I’m smack dab in the middle, and maybe you are too. I will say that I was surprised at how civil the two candidates were during the debate. It actually wasn’t horrible to watch.
My sister introduced me to ISideWith, a website where you can answer questions in multiple categories, including social, environmental, economic, domestic policy, healthcare, foreign policy, immigration, and science. It goes beyond just answering “Yes & No”. You can choose a different stance, as well as rate the issues in terms of how important they are to you. At the end, you’ll receive percentages regarding who you side with and in what categories. You can also see which side each state is swaying towards.
For those who are undecided like me, this is a great tool to get you started. If you missed the debate, you can watch it here. Make sure to tune into CNN for The Vice Presidential Debate on October 11th from 9:00-10:30PM Eastern Time, as well as The Second Presidential Debate on October 16th from 9:00-10:30PM Eastern Time . More importantly, make sure you are registered to vote and have requested your early voting ballot by mail. Otherwise, we’ll see you at the polls on November 6th!
Happy Voting!
{Photos via ISideWith and ABC News}
The Big Question: Your Future
While I post about many other topics, I still haven’t forgotten the purpose of this blog. The purpose of this blog is to give advice in regards to career paths, the economy, and proposed steps forward. I realize that I have been a working professional for only two years. But in those two years, I’ve worked for two very diverse, large-scale companies and have held a total of four positions. Some may think I’m “not qualified” to give advice, or maybe that this blog shouldn’t exist at all. Maybe they’re right. But I feel that I’ve made tremendous strides as a young working professional, and my hope is that I can share my experiences and what I’ve learned thus far so you can avoid making those mistakes. That is why I’m here.
Let’s start from the beginning. Let’s say you’re approaching college graduation. By this time, most people would recommend that you should have “at least two internships under your belt” and that you “should have been applying for jobs all year long as a senior”. Yes, this is sound advice. Is it absolutely necessary? No. At least in my opinion it’s not.
To be perfectly honest with you, I wasn’t thinking about my future that much when I was in college. Sure, I was working towards a degree and trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my life, just like everyone else. But I realized early on that I wanted to truly enjoy college. I did not have any internships. I did not have a part-time job. I spent one summer with friends and my new boyfriend, the second summer at weddings, the third summer in Europe on a study abroad trip, which leaves us with the fourth summer- the summer after graduation. THAT’S when I started applying for jobs. Personally, this was the best decision I’ve ever made. I knew that I would be working for the rest of my life, so why bog down the happiest time of my life with internships and part-time jobs that would turn out to be “less important” in the long run? I chose to live my life in the moment, and I haven’t regretted it since.
Right after I graduated, my roommates and I moved out of the townhouse we’d lived in for two years. I moved back in with my mom and worked a part-time job as a server at a restaurant to make some extra cash. You better believe when I wasn’t working, I was on my computer 24/7 applying for jobs. I would wake up in the morning, grab a cup of coffee from the kitchen, walk upstairs, and start scouring the internet for job listings in my pajamas. I remember my mom saying, “Shouldn’t you be getting dressed and dropping your resume off at places?” This brings me to my next point. There are so many tools available to us now that didn’t even exist five years ago. Yahoo Jobs, CareerBuilder, Monster, Indeed, Simply Hired, LinkedIn- the world we live in now is a job seeker’s dream world! You can immediately apply for jobs across the world with the click of button. No more snail mail. No more dropping your resume off in person. Live in a small town and want to get out? Always dreamed of living in a different country? You can! The internet is your oyster.
I mainly used Indeed when applying for jobs. This is because Indeed takes all of the job listings out there, from CareerBuilder, Monster, Yahoo, Simply Hired etc, and compiles them all into one website. Indeed and LinkedIn are the two I would recommend most. My dad has always said to me, “Getting the interview is the hardest part.” Boy, was he right. So before shooting off your resume into cyberspace, make sure it’s up-to-date and that you have an outstanding cover letter (more advice on that here). The downfall of applying for jobs on the internet is that after awhile, all of these resumes and cover letters begin to look the same to employers. Make yours stand out in a unique way without going over the top. It should look professional, neat, organized, and should be no longer than a page if you’re just starting out.
I submitted about 10-15 resumes online per day. If I was feeling really ambitious, sometimes I’d get to 20-25. I didn’t stick to just one industry-I applied to multiple ones. All I wanted was to get my foot in the door; I didn’t really care what industry the job was posted in. I knew I just needed to get some experience under my belt. My dream industry will find its way to me… eventually.
I applied for jobs, in all different industries, all sorts of positions, 10-15 per day, for a month and a half. I only got called for 3 or 4 interviews. One of those interviews turned out to be my lucky charm.
Don’t give up. Be persistent. If there’s a job out there that you really want and is realistically attainable, use LinkedIn to network. Communicate with others. Build your network. Ask for help. But most importantly, know in your heart that things will work out for you. Everyone’s timeframe is different, so don’t get discouraged. And by all means, if you want advice or need help, email me.
Seriously. You can pick my brain.
Wishful Wednesdays
It’s true. I’m a supernerd. I love reading and I love learning. I would rather spend my entire weekend at Barnes & Noble perusing art history, fashion design, interior design, business management, and self-improvement books than spend my weekend out at the bars or lazily watching TV all day in my pajamas. Those things are great too, but in a case of would you rather, I’d make my way over to B&N. Did I mention it’s two stories tall with a Starbucks? My sweet, sweet paradise.
I discovered recently that J.K. Rowling released a new novel, The Casual Vacany. While it’s not Harry Potter related, I’m sure it will make for an interesting story. I’m sure you can guess where this is headed. Presenting (dah dah dah): My Fall Book Wishlist.
The Casual Vacancy by J.K. Rowling
Divergent by Veronica Roth
(My sister introduced me to this – it’s similar to
The Hunger Games. Thanks, Erin!)
The Time Keeper by Mitch Albom
The Diviners by Libba Bray
The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin
Lucid by Adrienne Stoltz & Ron Bass
That should keep me busy. Happy Reading!
Use your head, in all aspects
Here is one of the many reasons why using your head is most important. Unless you want to be in debt forever and never expand your earning potential, I advise you think before you leap into one of these career fields.
No degree guarantees that a college graduate will earn more over a lifetime than a high school student. Worse still, there are many degrees where the average high school graduate will likely out-earn a college graduate.
If you’ve ever wanted to know the two main reasons why Americans decide not to go to college, the St. Louis Fed presented two convincing explanations. The more frightening of the two scenarios showed that, for students paying their own tuition, most will need a starting salary of $40,000 or better to overcome lifetime earnings of high school graduates.
How can it be that someone with a $40,000 starting salary can’t out-earn the average high school graduate? The reason is two-fold. Most college students forgo income while attending college. Also, given the average annual tuition of $25,000, a student paying his own way is facing a $100,000 college bill. Add the loss of income and the six-digit education tab, and graduates start their professional lives in a large financial hole.
If a starting salary of $40,000 is what it takes to overcome the high costs of going to college, you will want to know what degrees aren’t averaging the benchmark income. Georgetown pulled together statistics on average starting salary for many popular degrees. Below are five degrees with average starting salaries that may not be worth paying the costs for college.
Social Work
It’s great that you want to go to work every day and help others, but keep in mind that the average high school graduate will likely earn more money in his lifetime. Social work has an average starting salary of $30,000. Even those with experience can expect to find jobs at only $40,000.
Elementary Teachers
Recent college graduates have an unemployment rate of 4.8 percent. However, paying back your college loans might be a serious challenge. The average starting salary is only $33,000, and it’s not much better when you get experience. The average salary of an experienced teacher is $40,000.
Drama and Theater Arts
The riches and glamour of movie stars is not the reality of most college graduates with a drama and theater arts degree. Recent graduates can expect and average salary of $26,000 and an unemployment rate of 7.8 percent. With experience, however, majors can boost their salary to $45,000.
Family and Consumer Studies
Remember taking home economics in grade school? Family and consumer studies is a broad degree that explores how families interact in society, and home economics is one of the areas of study. While the degree might be practical, it only pays $30,000 per year for a college graduate and $43,000 for those with experience.
Anthropology and Archaeology
According to Georgetown’s statistics, it doesn’t pay well starting out as Indiana Jones. New graduates from degrees in anthropology and archaeology start earning at around $28,000. While starting salary is low, after a few years of experience, graduates in this field can earn up to $47,000. Unemployment for recent grads is very high at 10.5 percent.
So, should you avoid these degrees? Before you go changing your major, you need to understand that the starting salaries are based on averages. I’ve already discussed how misleading statistical decision-making can be. What this list should get you thinking about is this: Are you weighing the costs and the benefits before selecting a college? And are you looking at tuition and income specifically?
The main culprit driving the Fed research was paying a $100,000 tuition bill. That means that if you explore ways to lower college costs, any college degree could be a good investment. Perhaps it’s going to mean AP classes, a state school, or working hard to obtain scholarships. The point is that no college degree guarantees greater wealth and some degrees are riskier than others. If you want to increase your chances of your college degree increasing your earning potential, you need to think about the costs that go into obtaining a diploma and how you can minimize them.
Source: Yahoo News
Top Five Areas of Study for Bachelor’s Degrees
I was perusing some Yahoo articles and came across one I wanted to share. We all know a college education can dry up your bank account. It’s important to make sure your educational investment has the
potential to pay you back. So really, what is your education’s potential value?
“The rule of thumb is that someone with a bachelor’s degree makes about a million dollars more over their career than someone who doesn’t,” says Cheri Butler, associate director of the career center at the University of Texas at Arlington.
In fact, according to a 2011 Georgetown University Center on Education and the Workforce report titled “The College Payoff: Education, Occupations, and Lifetime Earnings,” a worker with a bachelor’s degree generally earns an average of $2.3 million over a lifetime – a significant amount more when compared to someone with only a high school diploma, who generally earns an average of $1.3 million over a lifetime.
Since the possibility of earning an extra million bucks sounds pretty nice, the National Association of Colleges and Employers’ (NACE) April 2012 “Salary Survey” report to pinpoint five bachelor’s degree level areas of study that are among the highest paying for college graduates.
In no particular order, here are the top 5 areas of study to consider for those pursuing Bachelor’s Degrees.
Area of Study #1 – Business
Overall Median Starting Salary: $47,748*
From selling newly developed products to marketing time-tested products in new ways, business people are always looking for a competitive edge when it comes to winning over consumers. So, if you have a competitive spirit, earning a bachelor’s degree in the business field could offer a potential return on investment.
For one thing, the numbers appear to be adding up just right for graduates with a bachelor’s in economics. With the median starting salary for 2012 economics grads at $54,800 (up 5.6 percent from 2011), it’s one of the top-paying majors in the business sector, according to NACE’s “Salary Survey.”
Starting Salaries for various Business Majors include:
- Finance: $49,700
- Accounting: $47,800
- International Business: $31,200
Potential Value: “In business, you have to take in a lot of information, digest it, and make sound decisions,” says Butler, who adds that business majors get value from being taught how to identify “the next big thing.”
“But it’s not just in business; it’s in economics and finance, too. A finance program shows you how to make predictions and forecasts and how to make sense out of them.”
Area of Study # 2: Communications
Overall Median Starting Salary: $40,022*
Whether you aspire to write a popular blog or head up the corporate communications division at a Fortune 500 company, being able to successfully deliver ideas to an audience is crucial.
During a bachelor’s in communications program, you might learn how to communicate in various mediums, which is likely a valuable skill in today’s high-tech, information-driven world, says Paul Timmins, career services director in the College of Liberal Arts at the University of Minnesota.
How valuable? The $40,022 overall median starting salary for 2012 communications grads represented a 3.8 percent increase from 2011, according to the “Salary Survey.”
Starting Salaries for various Communications Majors include:
- Advertising: $44,700
- Communications: $39,400
- Journalism: $37,500
Potential Value: “Communications is one of the top skills that we hear employers want,” says Timmins. “They might need you to communicate in a variety of ways, in a small group, one-on-one, large-group setting, or in writing. It’s a skill that can be applied in a lot of different places, such as sales, customer service, top management, writing, journalism, public relations, or advertising fields.”
Area of Study #3: Computer Science
Overall Median Starting Salary: $56,383*
Home computers have been on the market for a number of years, and new gadgets like smartphones and tablets continue to introduce new technologies. That begs the question, who’s behind all these technological advances? Tech-savvy people, that’s who.
Perhaps that’s the reason the NACE survey found starting salaries for graduates in the computer science field increased by 2.4 percent in the past year. That translates to a median starting salary increasing from $55,087 for 2011 graduates to $56,383 for 2012 graduates.
The “Salary Survey” also reports that employers in the information sector – the collection of businesses that produce and distribute information and develop the products that transmit and process data, such as software publishers – had the highest number of new graduate applicants, with starting salary offers of $64,400.
Starting Salaries for various Computer Science Majors include:
- Computer Science: $58,300
- Information Sciences and Systems: $52,000
Potential Value: “Do you know an organization that doesn’t have a computer system? I don’t,” Butler says. “They are a fact of life, and we need people who can keep them running and make the most of those important tools. Your company is dead in the water if it doesn’t use computer technology.”
Area of Study #4: Health Sciences
Overall Median Starting Salary: $43,477*
Ever been interested in working in a hospital setting as a nurse? Want to learn what it takes to keep a body going strong into its twilight years? If so, a bachelor’s degree in one of the health sciences could be the vehicle that helps drive you to your destination of helping others.
And check this out: the median starting salary for all health sciences graduates was almost unchanged, with a noteworthy salary of $43,477 in 2012 – less than a one percent change from the previous year, which was at $43,802, according to the “Salary Survey.”
Starting Salaries for various Health Science Majors include:
- Nursing: $48,400
- Health and Related Sciences: $36,400
Potential Value: Butler says health sciences majors could see added value in their degrees because health care workers are in great demand as the baby boom population ages.
“We are healthier and living longer, so we need assistance in maintaining a livable lifestyle,” Butler says. “The 79 million boomers need a lot of infrastructure to take care of them, so there are jobs in the health care field. It’s supply and demand in my opinion.”
Area of Study #5: Engingeering
Overall Median Starting Salary: $58,581*
Do you have natural problem-solving skills that you’d like to use on a professional level? By earning a bachelor’s degree in engineering, you might be able to hone those skills, and even get some potential value from your education.
How so? Consider this: The “Salary Survey” found that engineering grads hold the bragging rights for being the highest paid of all disciplines that NACE evaluated. Engineering grads who majored in computer engineering, for example, had a median starting salary of $67,800 in 2012.
Starting Salaries for various Engineering Majors include:
- Aerospace/Aeronautical/Astronautical Engineering: $64,200
- Civil Engineering: $55,300
- Bioengineering and Biomedical Engineering: $41,800
Potential Value: Butler credits the creative aspects of the engineering field for providing value to this degree. “Engineers are the ones who create new things,” Butler says. “Next year, we will be using technology that hasn’t been invented yet, and engineering is at the core of that.”
*Overall median starting salary figures for 2012 are taken from the National Association of Colleges and Employers’ April 2012 “Salary Survey: Starting Salaries for New College Graduates.” NACE Salary Survey data is produced through data taken from the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the Census Bureau, and a master data set developed by Job Search Intelligence.
Full article at Yahoo Education
Graduate school is now a reality
I did it. I finally did it.
After what felt like years of studying, writing essays, preparing admissions applications, and waiting for acceptance letters, I finally made my decision. After careful consideration, I decided to pursue my MBA at the University of St. Thomas with a concentration in International Business.
I visited with my advisor yesterday (who also happens to be the associate dean of the Cameron Business School) and registered for classes for the Fall term. The entire program will take 4 semesters to complete (36 total credits), and while I know I will be exhausted and overworked, I could not be more excited to be a student again. I’m also beyond happy I get to continue working – cash flow’s gotta come from somewhere.
I begin classes August 20th and will have very long work/school days on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays. Looks like I may have to change the title of this blog to “MBA Graduate, Now What?”
Nahh.
Stumpf Plaza
Chapel of St. Basil, Labyrinth and Gueymard Prayer Garden
Crooker Center Patio
Doherty Library
The Black Lab (bar near campus)
Campus Shot
All photos courtesy of University of St. Thomas
Post College Blues Part Two
The Turbulent Twenties. Isn’t this the stage a lot of us currently find ourselves in? Maybe you just recently graduated and have no idea what I’m talking about. Or maybe, you graduated over a year ago and understand precisely what this stage is. It’s a stage of confusion in your self-identity; a stage of wondering how to separate and individuate your college identity from this newfound, ever-changing professional identity.
I’ve tweeted and posted on Facebook mentions of a book I am currently reading. To be quite honest, this book has been my guiding light and salvation as of late. This masterpiece is called The Turbulent Twenties Survival Guide by Marcos R. Salazar.
Although I am only through the first section, I figured I’d post about it anyways. As I continue reading, I’ll post more ideas and thoughts I deem noteworthy.
Chapter One focuses mainly on one seemingly simple, yet complex question: Who are you after college? For the most part, we’ve found ourselves facing the reality that our view of ourselves, the world, and our place in it has been circumscribed by college and we’re now inadequate to cope with many of the challenges we’ll face. Soon after entering the working world, we quickly realize that who we were in school and who we were in class is often inapplicable in an environment that does not revolve around studying, writing papers, or taking exams. It is this lack of preparation that is making it so difficult for twenty-somethings to separate and individuate into our new post-college lives.
It is very clear that colleges are not fully preparing students for the new challenges of the twenty-first century. The result is a generation of young people who feel a sense of helplessness because our vision of self cannot effectively cope with the new matrix we’ve just entered into. (Amen.)
One critical aspect in determining our vision of self is that we are what we think. What can prevent us from accomplishing all of our goals is the idea that what we desire out of life is outside who we think we are and what we believe we’re capable of. If we think we’re not good enough to do something or that somehow we aren’t meant to be happy or successful, we will circumscribe who we are and continually prevent ourselves from achieving all the important desires we have during this period of life. This is especially easy to do after graduation because our confidence in what we are capable of can become seriously weakened.
This is why it is so important to separate from our old student identities, even if we are not fully prepared for our new lives, so that we don’t continue to have a vision of self that will limit us in accomplishing all that we want during our twenties.
The first step is building self-esteem.
1) Self-Efficacy is confidence in who you are. When you have confidence in your capacity to think and act effectively, you trust in your ability to create and achieve what you desire out of life, and persevere with grace under pressure in the process.
2) Self-Respect is your right as an individual. Giving up your goals and sacrificing who you are is the easiest thing in the world to do because, in reality, it takes a tremendous amount of strength, courage, and self-respect to honor your desires, to formulate independent judgments, to remain true to them, and to fight for your goals and passions when everyone else is telling you to be “practical” and stop dreaming.
3) Self-Respect is the foundation of respect for others.
The second step is developing a solid sense of self. You can find my previous post about that here. If you don’t click that link, this post will seem incomplete. Trust me.
The third step is accepting yourself. This starts with acknowledging the reality of who you are at this moment. If you admit to yourself, “I don’t know who I am”, it doesn’t mean you are saying, “I don’t know who I am, and that is okay with me.” What it means is, “I don’t know who I am, and I know it. I may not like it. In fact, sometimes it makes me feel weak, but right now I am putting my judgments and feelings aside and just facing the facts.” By accepting the reality of who you are and what you are thinking and feeling, you will begin to develop a stronger vision of self.
Remember, you have the power to say “This is who I really am at this moment. I may not like it, but I am not denying it either. I accept who I truly am right now.”
Learning to follow and integrate these types of psychological principles int your life is not an overnight process. It’s something that should be seen as a lifelong journey that requires ongoing commitment to self-examination and developing a better sense of who you are. By strengthening your self-esteem, you will begin facing postcollege life with greater confidence and optimism, and expand your capacity for happiness and fulfillment.
The next post in this series will discuss using the knowledge of who you are as a springboard for developing who you want to become during your twenties.
