Half the fun is not knowing

It’s like any other day. Cloudy skies, humid winds, and a light trickle of raindrops. I leave for work on time, but somehow traffic catches me. This isn’t surprising though because it always does. Much like Arizona drivers, Houston drivers panic at even the slightest variation in weather. Even if it isn’t actually raining, everyone drives at least 15 miles under the speed limit. I slam on my brakes a few times due to incompetent drivers changing lanes at the worst intervals. The scent of tea tree oil floods my car. My yoga mat is rolling around in the trunk and I get the feeling that it will be completely disheveled by the time I make it downtown. I come to a stop and look at the seat behind me. I had baked cupcakes the night before, and the cupcake holder isn’t doing much “cupcake holding”… more like cupcake tossing. There’s frosting everywhere. I sigh. Yep, it’s just another day.

It feels completely average and normal through most of the morning, until I start chatting with a friend (and coworker) of mine. We discuss the usual topics of conversation- how our mornings have been, how oddly slow-paced this week has felt, and how we can’t wait for the weekend. As we start talking about the future and what our futures hold, I suddenly break out of my present state of mind. As we sit there and ponder at our lunch table, a plethora of questions enter my realm of thought.

Wouldn’t it be easier if we could fast forward through our lives to see the end, if only for a moment, just to know everything turned out okay? Wouldn’t it be nice to know that everything you had hoped, wished, and dreamed for had been fulfilled? That you got everything you ever wanted and more? Okay, I know I’m drifting into fairytale mode, so I’ll stop with that last thought.

I think to myself, “Why, yes. I’d love to know ahead of time that everything will turn out okay. That I’m making all the right decisions as they come along, which will ultimately lead to my success and happiness.” I believe this thought has crossed everyone’s minds at one point or another. And while most would agree, there is one monumental piece we all seem to have forgotten:

Half the fun, half the journey, is not knowing.

Trust me, I get it. At this juncture in time, it would feel great to know that things turn out okay in the end. But already knowing what’s going to happen along the way… where’s the fun in that? We’d just be living our lives waiting for the next moments, instead of creating them… instead of truly living them. I don’t know about you, but I would much rather create my moments than wait for them.

I don’t want anything to be predetermined. I like to think I am doing this all on my own. That everything I have worked for, achieved, and learned have been because of me and the moments I have created. Not because I’ve sat around and waited for the next moment to occur.

So next time you find yourself wishing you already knew which decision to make, which road to choose, or what choice will make you happiest, take a second. Stop. Close your eyes. Breathe. And trust yourself enough to know that you will choose what’s right.